The Hardest Question You'll Ever Answer
It’s one of the hardest questions you’ll ever face: “What do you really want in life?”
Most people avoid the subject altogether. A handful will live their whole lives without ever finding an answer.
I hope that’s not the case for you. I sure as heck hope it won’t be for me.
It’s Mindy Tyson McHorse here. And this topic is tough for me because of some recent big life changes. The last time I joined you, I was about to give birth. Today, I’m the proud mother of a baby girl — Calla.
Calla and her older brother, Quinn, are my catalysts for change. My wants and needs are shifting since life isn’t just about me anymore. Which brings me back to the question of pinpointing what I really want — for me and for them.
It’s a scary question for a lot of us because acknowledging our true desires paves the way for potential disappointment. If we never admit we have certain goals, we’ll never fail to achieve them, right?
I should clarify. I’m not referring to all those things we’re supposed to want, like good health and financial security.
I’m talking about those deepest-of-deep passions that you may have never admitted to anybody else. Maybe you don’t even acknowledge them yourself.
Well, it’s time to fix that. This is your opportunity to get out of the slump a lot of us wind up in once life takes on a methodical rhythm.
By the end of this week, you should be able to pinpoint what you really want in life — along with how to get it.
That’s my promise to you. All I ask in return is that you keep up with The Writer’s Life this week and share your comments with me as we go.
For today, just start chewing on the question … what do you want from life?
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The way I've always asked that question is "I can't decide what I want to be when I grow up."
At 58, I discovered journalism and that is what I was aiming toward all my life. Now I write all the time, reporting on happenings where I live. I also do freelance writing, and one of these days, (yeah, I know) will earn even more money at it.
MAM – August 8, 2011 at 4:12 pm
Congrats Mindy on your new bundle of joy! What a great topic to discuss this week. I recently had a coaching session with a well-known "guru" in personal success, who asked me the very same question. Asking yourself this is a great way of gaining perspective at times when the line is blurring between what you MUST do vs. what you WANT to do, something all freelancers face regularly. To most of us, the answer is likely to be "to make more money with less stress". Anyone else care to jump in? - Tess
Tess C Taylor of Taylor Resources Writing – August 8, 2011 at 5:23 pm
I remember being at Bootcamp last year and seeing two pregnant women. One of them was Mindy. I could not believe the other lady was eight months along and flew in from New Mexico.
I gave up trying to answer, but the closest thing I can say is this: I want to write. Want to be in control of my own life and livelihood. But I want to get STARTED. That's the hardest part so far.
I'm now trying to write for my new site. Hard time getting it done. No experience. The words don't come. I keep at it.
AmyODonnell – August 8, 2011 at 9:35 pm
Hi Mindy, I have to admit I find myself struggling with that internal tug-o-war all the time: what I want deep down and what I think it´s "acceptable" to want (without seeming greedy or superficial!)...I´m really looking forward to this week´s Writer´s Life and the insights it´s sure to bring!
JanM;)
JanM – August 9, 2011 at 2:18 am
I would like to just be happy- physically and spiritually. In life that can sometimes seem so far away or impossible, but its a goal to work towards. Im working hard right now to become one of the greatest drummers in the world and the more i improve the many more number of drummers i see greater than me. Why would i continue a dream that seems nearly impossible to begin with? Its simply because i love drumming so much! Im happy with what im doing, so i'll strive to be the best to get what i want in life.
Guest (Greg) – August 9, 2011 at 2:38 am
I felt very compelled to comment. I do know what I want in life. To keep the job I have (part-time would be nice), write greeting cards, create books that I can introduce the topic on and have others share their feelings, points of view, opinions, etc. I have titles coming out of the woodwork but don't know where to begin... Now, if I can do all of this part-time on a sunny, warm, beach - life would be just perfect! Thanks for the question and for giving me the opportunity to comment! Best Regards!
Guest (Ter) – August 9, 2011 at 10:30 am
Hi Mindy and congrats on being a new mom. I already have the answer to that question. I want to be my own boss and earn a great income as a freelance writer and copywriter.
Unemployed since December of 2010, started my own biz in March called Keywords Media and I'm just plucking away at the moment. I have three of my own blogs, and I'm a featured writer on the blog Social Corruption. The dream continues.
Guest (Lew) – August 9, 2011 at 2:19 pm
Thanks all, for the congratulations! I am certainly enjoying these months of Baby Bliss.
Sounds like we can all relate to the dream of wanting to be in control of our money and time while following a passion. What I find difficult is taking it one step further and asking what I want that is completely unusual. Only by digging deep for an answer to that one do I REALLY feel like I've addressed the question. My answer? To pay off my house so I have a "base," and then live all over the world!
Mindy – August 9, 2011 at 4:34 pm
I want to transform the entire planet as shown in my pictures in photobucket.
Guest (LadyLifeGrows) – August 9, 2011 at 10:42 pm
Congratulations on the new addition to your family, Mindy!
After many years of not knowing what I wanted from life, I defined it last year as "the ability to work when I want, where I want, for as long as I want and still make a super income." As of now I still don't know what the vehicle will be to get there, but at least I know where I want to go.
Schalk – August 10, 2011 at 3:59 am
At 59, and still growing, there is no doubt that I want to be a freelance travel writer and share my travel adventures and photography full time. I know it will happen but not sure how, that is the mystery.
Guest (Lindsay) – August 10, 2011 at 8:34 pm
Yes! I'm so impressed with you three -- LadyLife, Schalk, and Lindsay -- for sharing (and knowing) what you want! Saying it out loud, or in this case, typing it for others to see, is the first step to achieving it. I'm proof -- I never would have finally seen my income take off last year if I hadn't declared it loud and clear on the Wealthy Web Writer Reality Blog.
Best of luck to you all in succeeding -- please keep me posted!
Mindy – August 10, 2011 at 11:57 pm